Flood report a step forward

News of the Oireachtas Environment Committee taking a shot at the government over its response to two natural disasters is a healthy sign of a well functioning democracy in Ireland.

Ireland really wasn’t riding its luck last winter. In November a massive “one in eight-hundred years” flood devastated the country, and shorty afterwards, in January, the country was literally frozen still by a protracted cold snap.

Despite the monumentally bad luck the government faced in having to cope with not one but two natural disasters in a winter, though, it didn’t exactly shine forth in brilliance with its response.

Being in Ireland both during the floods and the cold snap I saw first hand just how poorly the “authorities” dealt with both situations.

Salt ran out; rivers were flooded; people were airlifted; it was a mess.

Perhaps the most blackly comical moment of the whole episode came in Cork, when the ESB (Ireland’s national electricity company) made a bad situation worse by opening a dam floodgate which led to even more flooding in an already swamped city. Talk about planning!

That was funny in a 'only in Ireland' sort of way, unless, of course, you were one of the people being rafted down the quays by the fire service or found your car afloat the next day. Then, of course, the humour was well and truly lost on you.

And rightfully so, that blunder will be the subject of an “independent investigation” at some indefinite point in time, but then again the initial one into the whole fiasco ordered by the Minister for the Environment hasn’t been completed yet, as the thick of another winter looms just a few months away.

The ‘big freeze’, just over a month later, was another fantastic spectacle of governmental incompetence.

Returning home from America from a short stay, I found a country in devastation. Supplies of road gritting salt were almost completely depleted and the government was busy fussing over how to get some more salt and from whom, while some of the country's most important thoroughfares remained impassable.

It was hard to believe that lots of the roads around Cork simply weren’t being gritted because there wasn’t enough to go around. Yes of course, they "hadn't anticipated" this level of ice, global warming only made the world hotter.

The sight to top it all off, though, came after the ice had thawed, when I saw a massive truckload of gritting salt making its way hopelessly and uselessy to Tivoli Docks, presumably for storage for next winter. The much anticipated salt, apparently, had arrived too late.

Anyone Irish or foreign in the country, or perhaps reading about it for the first time now, would realize that something was seriously amiss here.

Yet how much have things changed?

Here’s an interesting experiment. Open up another tab, go to Google, and type in ‘Ireland emergency’, see what comes up, open another tab, then type in ‘NYC emergency’.

At least from what I have here in New York, the first result in the Ireland search is a Wikipedia entry about The Emergency in Ireland (WWII), followed by some newspaper articles, followed by a satirical comedy team.

The first result in the US search brings up the NYC Office of Emergency Management.

What does that tell you about Ireland's emergency planning?

Fortunately all hope isn’t lost. The very fact that the Oireachtas Environment Committee published a report is to be welcomed. So is the forthcoming one urged to be published by this November. The Minister for the Environment's response that the government did everything in its powers is merely to be expected.

It takes a man to admit his own faults, and it’s good to see that Ireland’s political class finally seems to have acknowledged - at least in some circles - that the management of the disaster was almost as big a catastrophe as the floods and ice themselves.

Perhaps we can hope for a more successful winter this time round; though I'm hanging on to any spare salt just in case!

Nude Bike Race a Great Idea

The county that’s promising to bring Ireland its first ever installation of the wacky Paddy Games brought together 56 daring cyclists to pedal naked around the streets of Cork in the early hours of yesterday morning.

Co.Cork, proudly and aptly known as The Rebel County, hosted the event to roughly coincide with the Cork Cycling Arts Festival. It got underway at 5:45am, and despite the typically dismal weather conditions and half-frozen participants it was a roaring success by all accounts.

The recurring theme from the news reports, which are already in, was the encouraging reception the motley troupe of naked riders got from the general public, which was described as constantly positive and involved much hooting and cheering.

This is good, but it’s more than their nudity that the Irish public was cheering on; it was their positivity and bravado.

As the Irish Time’s Shane Hegarty remarks in this excellent column, the very concept of mass nudity marks a step forward in Irish society. Whereas just a few short years ago mass displays of public nudity were viewed with a jaundice eye, they’re now more widespread than ever before.

From University College Cork’s nude campus quad run during RAG week, to famous naturalist photographer Spencer Tunick’s nude photoshoots in Blarney and Dublin and of course nude bike trecks, it seems like everyone - or at least a lot of people - are getting naked and having a good time!

What it all points to is a welcome liberalization of a once somewhat repressed society; a subtle but perceptible shift in the public’s perception of nudity, and the welcome revelation that having a laugh is sometimes more important than following boring social norms. Best of all it’s a great and creative thing to do during a recession. Although you’d be hard-pressed to argue that it has a positive economic effect on the country, (nude cycling tourism, perhaps?) it certainly seems to have put a lot of smiles on faces, which certainly helps immensely.

Just yesterday Moody’s credit rating agency gave its weighty seal of disapproval to the flailing Irish economy, downgrading the whole country’s credit rating to a sub-optimal AA2 standard. That’s the kind of negativity Ireland is dealing with on a daily basis and perhaps this is one of the small ways which with it combats it. And if so, what harm?

If only the government were half as entertaining and good at creating diversions as the folks organizing this fine idea perhaps Moody’s dismal credit downgrade wouldn’t even make the national news, and people would have a lot more reasons to smile! Let’s hope that day arrives.

Head Shop Bill Finally Hits Nail (Almost) On The Head

Amidst the usual furore of midsummer Orange Parade - GAA - etc - coverage, the Irish media have largely missed out on a story which obsessed them for most of this year year: the Department of Justice’s self-proclaimed war on legal highs.

In true media fashion all the uproar was about the head-shops, about how bad they were, and about how many young people were becoming hooked on their toxic output. Yet when the Dail finally decided to legislate against the phenomenon - by passing the Criminal Justice Psychoactive Substances Bill - there was hardly a whisper.

One of the marvels of modern technology is the ability to accurately assess the level of media coverage and uncover discrepancies in reportage. Running a simple Google News Archive search for the term ‘Head Shop’ and then limiting the location to Ireland (location:ireland), it’s possible to observe the curious phenomenon of a drop-off in media reports once the problem was tackled.

Media reports spiked in April then died down steadily until June, once the new legislation came in. In fact once the problem’s been sorted we find that there’s an even lower level of coverage than in January. Perhaps this is to be expected: once there’s no more scope for sensationalism the media fanfare dies down, but just how concerned are the media once there are no more stories about venerable 20 year olds winding up in A&E departments to report on?

Perhaps this is a broader problem in the Irish media. There’s an overwhelming tendency to criticize the government for whatever wrongs it might commit and a sharply underwhelming one when the same government is due praise.

The dilemma was this: that Irish “head-shops” were selling legal versions of illegal drugs to the general public. These so-called ‘legal highs’ were similar but often stronger and more dangerous than their illegal equivalents. Products with synthetic cannabinoids closely mimicked the effects of cannabis, but could be bought off the street like a bar of chocolate.

The government tried several failed legislative ventures before it settled on the current one, which is due to be signed by the President at any moment.

The successful addition to Ireland’s Statute Book was called the Criminal Justice Psychoactive Substances Bill (2010), and its success all boiled down to the following short words in its definition sedction:

“psychoactive substance” means a substance, product, preparation,
plant, fungus or natural organism which has, when consumed by a
person, the capacity to—

(a) produce stimulation or depression of the central nervous
system of the person, resulting in hallucinations or a significant
disturbance in, or significant change to, motor 30
function, thinking, behaviour, perception, awareness or
mood, or

(b) cause a state of dependence, including physical or psychological
addiction;

In short what the government decided to do was to ban any herb or product that had any effect on the mind, and that could be addictive.

I was very wary of this definition at first. Being a barely out of teenage college student I’m naturally suspicious of any government's attempt to illegalize nature, but with this definition I think there’s very little scope for argument.

Not everything ‘psychoactive’ has been banned, which would be fairly terrible. Banned products must also pose a threat of physical or psychological addiction. It’s hard to argue with outlawing something that could be addictive.

An example of what we don't want to ban is a fairly obscure and harmless herbal product called 'kava'. Although making a slow rise in popularity in America, in Ireland it remains almost completely obscure. I heard about it through a friend and ordered some off the net. It's a bit like drink, only without any impairment of motor function. It may be psychoactive, but as it's not addictive, it won't be banned - which is good.

We all know when the government makes a mess of setting laws, because it happens all the time.

Sometimes, though, they get it right, and we should be happy when they do so. Striking the right kind of balance between outlawing dangerous legal highs and keeping legal other products is a difficult one to find; perhaps now they have.

Journalist in hot water over Kerry swipe

Irish-American journalist Dave Hannigan has landed himself in hot water for remarks he made about both the Irish heritage certificates and about Killarney.

In short, the Long Island based writer called the heritage certs a “money grab sponsored by Dail Eireann,” and called Killarney, County Kerry a tourist-trap rip-off.

Kerrymen from Catherdaniel to Ballybunion reacted with predictable ire to the piece, which appeared in the Irish Mail on Sunday. “Hannigan owes Killarney an apology” harangued one local businessman, while the local rep of the Irish Hotels Federation called Hannigan’s column “cheapskate and cheap shot journalism that reflects no credit on the journalist who penned it or the paper that published it." Ouch!

The column, fortunately, is full of little gems which have annoyed Kerrymen because they’re true, well made, and show the heritage cert scheme for exactly what it is, while taking a swipe at good ol’ Killarney at the same time!

"Bad as it is when avaricious shopkeepers and publicans try to take advantage* of sentimental old fools trying to get in touch with their ancestral roots,” says the journalist, “how much worse is it when the money-grab is sponsored by Dáil Éireann?"

Hannigan then categorizes the whole scheme as: "the shameless spectacle of a government department basically turning itself into the bureaucratic equivalent of Killarney."

I think the point is very valid. Writing for my blog on IrishCentral.com, I tentatively hinted at that point, though didn’t express it as bravely or eloquently as Dave Hannigan did.

One feature of the certificates seems to be that they’ll make their holders eligible for a variety of discounts including reduced airfares to Ireland.

It’s hard to see Ireland’s economic collapse and ebbing tourist trade as a happy co-incidence in all this.

Call me cynical, but part of me thinks that one of the main reasons, perhaps even the main reason, for issuing the Certificates was to provide a boost to our economy and tourist trade.

That’s how I put it. What I should have done was explicitly say that the proposed scheme sounds like a money-making operation for the government, hoping to use a discount to lure Americans to part with their cash in places.

Hannigan’s incisive piece merely says two things. First, that the government-pushed ‘heritage certificate’ scheme is merely a thinly-disguised money-making rackiet being pushed by an increasingly desperate tourism industry to try and lure Americans to Ireland. And secondly that it’s comparable in its appetite for tourists’ cash to the town of Killarney. And for making those two valid points Hanigan has nobody to apologize to.

Killarney is a tourist trap and we all know it is. American’s know it before they go there and buy the ridiculously overpriced merchandise, while its name is synonymous in Ireland with tourism. Yet what harm comes of this. It benefits the local economy and Americans seem to have a great time, so everyone comes out smiling.

Kerry “businessmen” demanding an apology and making comments like "This is the same kind of nonsense we have listened to for years and it all gets a little bit tiring after a while” is a bit hypocritical to say the least. Tourism is by far the largest industry in Killarney and it would be apparent to all but the most naive that a large part of that thriving industry is built on the back of charging the “Yanks’ an extra few quid here and there for some cuddly leprechaun toys.

Yet Americans love coming to Ireland, the Irish love hosting them, and no bad comes of it. Any tourist trap has its tourist spots. Walk up to Times Square and you’ll find plenty of overpriced ‘I Love NYC’ merchandise, yet how many oversensitive New Yorkers would be offended and demand an apology if you called some of the shops there rip-offs!?

The Kerrymen angrily calling for an apology need to take a reality check and realize that Killarney is indeed in large parts a rip-off and then realize that a large part of their income is probably derived either directly or indirectly from American tourists in the first place!

Ripoff American Universities Deserve No Sympathy

Perhaps the only area in which America manages to exceed Ireland in terms of being a rip-off is in its education sector, which is one of the most prohibitively expensive in the world.

Everyone knows that going to university in America is a ferociously expensive endeavour, and I’d say it’s almost beyond dispute to say that this situation simply isn’t right. Education, as a fundamental social progresor, should be as open to the population as possible, yet charging the kind of extortionate sums that American universities do simply isn’t compatible with this idea. Going to college shouldn’t necessarily encumber you with massive debt, yet here it does, which simply isn’t right.

Yet even when you’ve managed to get within the university system, it seems, the great third-levels of America are still intent on fleecing you on the way out.

I’ve had the not so distinct pleasure of having just spent four weeks within one of NYU’s two unair-conditioned dorms where conditions during the recent heatwave were pretty sticky to say the least.

Not having air conditioning is fairly bad, but then again you agreed to that before you signed up for it and so you can’t really complain, but why the stringent ban being imposed on bringing in your own units?

The answer - or so NYU says - has to do with power, but then again in most other countries in the world rent is understood to include reasonable incidentals like electricity consumption. Water heating, refrigeration, lights, and televisions also consume large amounts of electricity - especially when used together - yet NYU doesn’t see fit to ban these items, which are surely less necessary than staying cool in triple digit temperatures, so the ban doesn’t really make much sense.

But the kick in the teeth came when Rubin’s Residence Hall Director sent out a group email imploring heat-stricken residents to use their fan units as little as possible because of the drain on power which such units would cause. Then of the air conditioning units the e-mail says: “This is a reminder that portable A/C units are not allowed at Rubin (the dorm building). Our electrical system cannot handle the power levels these units require. Please be aware that having one is an actual policy violation.” So much for concern!

The second nuisance about a summer in NYU is the time the dining halls close. NYU force you to take a meal plan when you stay at their summer dorms, so you’ve effectively no choice about having to spend at least $100 a week on food there. Yet they close every day at 8pm, which gives you just about enough time to leave the office at six - sometimes later - , commute back home, stop off in the dorm, and walk an additional five blocks to the dining hall, where you’ll face more waits and queues. Try doing this in a place like Manhattan and it's surprisingly difficult. Not exactly customer service at its best, then.

Yet by far the biggest irritation came today when I was finalizing a move to a slightly more expensive dorm which has air conditioning (worth it, of course). Doing so, I decided to cancel my meal plan, as I wasn’t using it a lot anyway and was moving into somewhere with a kitchen where I could prepare my own food.

I also discovered last night that I'd over $120 worth of "dining dollars" on my NYU student card. This was good news as it meant - or so I thought - that even after having cancelled a meal plan I could continue to buy food in the dining halls. Yet of course, in ripoff NYU, this is not the case. You cancel the mealplan and you lose everything. "You should use all your dining dollars this week, because you will not be able to access your dining dollars after your meal plan cancellation becomes effective," a Senior Manager from the Housing Office told me.

Thinking back on my own college, University College Cork, I can proudly say that my university does everything within its power to take care of its students, treat them with respect, and minimize the costs of going to university for them.And for domestic students, it's free to begin with.

The kind of ripoff tactics which NYU seems intent on using to enrichen its already bountiful coffers would be simply unheard of back in Ireland.

It's time that NYU took a good hard look at how they generate revenue and find a way to do so that doesn't tread on the toes and rights of their paying students.

Irish Voice contributor Dave Hannigan has landed himself in hot water for remarks he made about both the Irish heritage certificates and about Killarney.

In short, the Long Island based writer called the heritage certs a “money grab sponsored by Dail Eireann,” and called Killarney, County Kerry a tourist-trap rip-off.

Kerrymen from Catherdaniel to Ballybunion reacted with predictable ire to the piece, which appeared in the Irish Mail on Sunday. “Hannigan owes Killarney an apology” harangued one local businessman, while the local rep of the Irish Hotels Federation called Hannigan’s column “cheapskate and cheap shot journalism that reflects no credit on the journalist who penned it or the paper that published it." Ouch!

The column, forunately, is full of little gems which have annoyed Kerrymen because they’re true, well made, and show the heritage cert scheme for exactly what it is, while taking a swipe at good ol’ Killarney at the same time!

"Bad as it is when avaricious shopkeepers and publicans try to take advantage* of sentimental old fools trying to get in touch with their ancestral roots,” says the journalist, “how much worse is it when the money-grab is sponsored by Dáil Éireann?"

Hannigan then categorizes the whole scheme as: "the shameless spectacle of a government department basically turning itself into the bureaucratic equivalent of Killarney."

I think the point is very valid. Writing for my blog on IrishCentral.com, I tentatively hinted at that point, though didn’t express it as bravely or eloquently as Dave Hannigan did.

One feature of the certificates seems to be that they’ll make their holders eligible for a variety of discounts including reduced airfares to Ireland.

It’s hard to see Ireland’s economic collapse and ebbing tourist trade as a happy co-incidence in all this.

Call me cynical, but part of me thinks that one of the main reasons, perhaps even the main reason, for issuing the Certificates was to provide a boost to our economy and tourist trade.

That’s how I put it. What I should have done was explicitly say that the proposed scheme sounds like a money-making operation for the government, hoping to use a discount to lure Americans to part with their cash in places.

Hannigan’s incisive piece merely says two things. First, that the government-pushed ‘heritage certificate’ scheme is merely a thinly-disguised money-making rackiet being pushed by an increasingly desperate tourism industry to try and lure Americans to Ireland. And secondly that it’s comparable in its appetite for tourists’ cash to the town of Killarney. And for making those two valid points Hanigan has nobody to apologize to.

Killarney is a tourist trap and we all know it is. American’s know it before they go there and buy the ridiculously overpriced merchandise, while its name is synonymous in Ireland with tourism. Yet what harm comes of this. It benefits the local economy and Americans seem to have a great time, so everyone comes out smiling.

Kerry “businessmen” demanding an apology and making comments like "This is the same kind of nonsense we have listened to for years and it all gets a little bit tiring after a while” is a bit hypocritical to say the least. Tourism is by far the largest industry in Killarney and it would be apparent to all but the most naive that a large part of that thriving industry is built on the back of charging the “Yanks’ an extra few quid here and there for some cuddly leprechaun toys.

Yet Americans love coming to Ireland, the Irish love hosting them, and no bad comes of it. Any tourist trap has its tourist spots. Walk up to Times Square and you’ll find plenty of overpriced ‘I Love NYC’ merchandise, yet how many oversensitive New Yorkers would be offended and demand an apology if you called some of the shops there rip-offs!?

The Kerrymen angrily calling for an apology need to take a reality check and realize that Killarney is indeed in large parts a rip-off and then realize that a large part of their income is probably derived either directly or indirectly from American tourists in the first place!

NYU and "judicial consequences"

Perhaps the only area in which America manages to exceed Ireland in terms of being a rip-off is in its education sector, which is one of the most prohibitively expensive in the world.

Going to university in America is a ferociously expensive endeavor. It’s almost beyond dispute that this situation leaves a lot to be desired. Education, as a catalyst for social progression, should be as open to the population as possible. This of course, would be achieved by charing as little as possible for tuition there, yet in America this obviously isn't the case.

Yet even when you’ve managed to get within the university system, by paying the massive six-digit tuition fees, extortion still abounds.

Having just had the not so distinct pleasure of spending four weeks in one of NYU’s two unair-conditioned dorms I've had a firsthand insight into the "ripoff" NYU culture which I'd heard so much about.

The first negative thing that struck me as a foreign student in an NYU dorm was the constant - seemingly unending - threats of "judicial consequences" for any actions which NYU frowned upon. Every comminuqué from NYU ends with a salutary reminder of just what you have to do to face the dreaded "judicial consequences". The threats are laughable, though.

A few weeks into my stay I lost my room key. I was told that the replacement fee would be $100. As this figure was wildly out of synch with my expectations I asked my friends if this were indeed the correct figure. Good thing I asked - the cost was $25. After three days of futile efforts to try resist paying the fee I finally tore down the A4 sign that showed the cost to be $25 for the key in question. Did I get an apology? Hardly; this could result in "judicial consequences" I was told.

Yet this was just one of many incidents.

The lower-end NYU dorms don't have air conditions or let you bring them in. When temperatures soar to triple digits, as they did this summer, that's pretty hard going. Yet imagine being asked to turn off your fans in the midst of a heatwave? That's precisely what happened:

During the heatwave an email from the Residence Hall Director implored residents to use their fans as little as possible, then went on to note that: "Portable A/C units are not allowed at Rubin (the dorm building). Our electrical system cannot handle the power levels these units require. Please be aware that having one is an actual policy violation.” Judicial consequences again, then. So much for concern!

There are plenty of other ways in which NYU seeks to make a dime at your naivete. The dining halls - which you're forced to use at least 7 times a week, if staying in NYU accommodation - close at 8PM weekdays and don't even open on weekends. Considering that you're forced into spending at least $70 a week on a meal plan, these hours couldn't be much more inconvenient. Consider finishing your internship at 6:30 then trying to commute home and rush over there in time. Trust me, it's not easy.

And what happens if you want to cancel the meal plan? You loose everything. Unspent money falls straight into the surely bountiful coffers of NYU. The whole place reeks of extortion and judicial consequences.

I'm sure - in fact I know - that NYU is a magnificent institution of learning. Yet however nice its campus, however great its teaching, and however stellar its research, the least it can do is to treat its paying students with respect and without constant threats of lawsuits for tearing down signs. That kind of business does nobody any favors.